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Learning Persuasion
One of my students recently asked me, 'Kenrick, how do you keep track of all of these persuasion strategies? Over the last few years we've learned dozens and dozens of them and each call we have you teach us a new technique. I can't even remember to use the unconscious hello. . .how can I remember all of them?'
One of my students recently asked me, ‘Kenrick, how do you keep track of all of these persuasion strategies? Over the last few years we’ve learned dozens and dozens of them and each call we have you teach us a new technique. I can’t even remember to use the unconscious hello. . .how can I remember all of them?’
My question to him was, ‘When you learn a new language, are you fluent in a week or two?’
When you learn a new instrument, can you play Rachmaninoff after a couple of lessons?
Persuasion is a subject that is just as complex as learning a new language or a new instrument, possibly even more difficult because it’s ever expanding. If you’ve ever learned a language, and you practice this language, you will know all there is to know. Persuasion is different. It’s an ever expanding subject that continues to grow by leaps and bounds.
The best way I know to become a world class persuader is to master the basic principles. Mastering the basics requires you to do what people do when they’re learning something new: you must practice.
’Learning’ has been traditionally broken down into five different categories: imprinting, habituation, associative learning, observational learning and play.
Imprinting is a phase-based learning usually associated with young animals and humans and is the process by which babies learn from their parents. This, obviously, has no use for us in learning persuasion, but for the fact that the brain state which is achieved by use of the light and sound machines closely resembles the brain state of the very young.
Habitual learning is a response to stimulus. If the stimulus is neither rewarding nor harmful, then the response usually diminishes over time. This learning is associated with the other than conscious or subconscious mind.
In persuasion the two types of learning that we most often utilize are observational learning and play. With observational learning, we observe and repeat. Observe and repeat. It’s that simple. So when my student asks about the ‘unconscious hello’, I say, observe and repeat.
The last type of learning is play. I think play is a beautiful concept. I assign home play at the each of my conference calls because I believe play enhances, greatly, the learning process.
We’re all successful in our fields. Many of us have high pressure work environments. And yet, I can’t help thinking that part of what we do when we meet for our quarterly meetings is quite playful. Role playing, camaraderie, even the occasional game. Some play is unrestrained and has no outcome, but our play has a clearly defined goal, as does our work.
So for my frustrated student, I’ll say, persuasion is play, persuasion is observing, persuasion is a habit, persuasion is repeating, persuasion is emulation, persuasion is commitment and persuasion is intention. Persistence. Persuasion comes in time.