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What's Really Eating Me?
Being upset about weight may be a cover for some other issue of concern. It is easier to be angry about one's weight than to worry about work, family, friends, or, in this case, getting older. Figuring out what's really eating you (pardon the pun) may help save energy for what's really important.
Copyright (c) 2008 At Peace With Food
Tomorrow I have a doctor’s appointment. It’s nothing serious-just a few changes about the changes I’m experience as I umm, mature. But I am not looking forward to the check-in routine when I get there. You know what I mean-blood pressure and, yes, weight.
For some reason, I am just not looking forward to being weighed, and I don’t even know why I am thinking about it! I feel so silly, because I talk to women (and some men) all the time about how a single number is not that important. It is important for me to help people understand that weight is only a small part of who they are and what their lives mean. We put too much importance on this single number, and make such drastic judgments about ourselves based on it. I want people to stop wasting their energy on this and find other truly important issues with which to spend their time. Like being with family, friends, reading, living.
So what is bothering me? I haven’t even weighed myself for, who knows? I don’t know what I weigh. I am sure the doctor won’t care, or even look at the number, so what’s going on?
Now is the time for me to really practice what I preach.” I truly believe that being at peace with food is a long-term relationship that, like all relationships, has its ups and downs. I think I must be in a down phase right now, and I’m not sure why. Perhaps I am more concerned about why I am seeing the doctor, and it is easier to focus on the weight. It’s always easier to blame mood on weight than to consider what is the real problem, right? It’s easier to think that personal or business relationships are not going the way we like because we are fat, and unworthy of attention. I know I have wasted time thinking about my weight-and missing out on other important times, like being with friends and family.
I think my concerns may be that I can no longer look in the mirror and see a young person, and that bothers me more than I’d like it to. Perhaps I am just not sure what is going on with my body, and I’m not sure I want to know. I mean, I do know that bodies change as we age-I’ve read the books and even volunteered at the organizations that work with these issues. I know that I am going to keep coloring my hair for the next gazillion years because I’m just not ready to be gray. I know I can keep walking and watch what I am eating to help reduce my risk for chronic illnesses like heart disease and high blood pressure. But I also know that I am getting to an age where my genes may start pulling ahead of my personal effort to hold off these changes.
Say, we may be on to something. Perhaps it is easier to worry about my weight than accept the fact that my body is changing. I think it may be time to not just settle for being at peace with food-I need to make time to learn to be at peace with my body.
Say, thanks for helping me figure out what’s eating me!