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Scales Of Justice, II
How is it possible that your whole life can be changed by a simple number? How can you let your sense of accomplishment, your sense of self be dictated by a number found on a bathroom scale? Let's hope for a time when scales don't have that kind of power-when we have enough confidence in our bodies and our food choices to decide for ourselves how we feel-not some number on a machine.
The other day I met a friend for lunch. We were sitting in a diner, chatting about our lives, families, friends. Then, the inevitable happened (as it always does, you know)-weight and food. But this time it was different, she wasn’t talking about her weight, she was telling me a sad story about a friend of hers, whom she’d just visited.
Her friend (let’s call her K) is a large sized woman who has been trying to lose weight for as long as she can remember. This fried of hers had been on many diets, gained and lost, gained and lost. You know the drill. This time, when my friend was at her house, though, she knew something good had happened. K was cheerful, bouncing around, talking happily about her life- and, most interesting, she had her shirt tucked in. When asked why she seemed so cheerful (and comfortable with herself), K said it was because she had recently lost 8 pounds. Ahh, THAT explained the shirt being tucked in. We all have our “tells“-things we do when we are feeling good about ourselves. I, personally, wear sleeveless shirts when I feel confident about my body. Why I think my arms may be thinner, who knows? But it’s my “tell”.
And this woman felt good.
My friend and K were having a wonderful time together. They were laughing, telling jokes, talking about how good life was, and how they were both doing so well. Later during the visit, her husband came home. He had been grocery shopping and began unpacking. When he was finished putting the food away, he went into the bathroom. He brought out the scale and carried it into the kitchen, where the women were sitting. “Why are you doing that?” K asked, a small shudder in her voice. “Because it’s broken, it needs new batteries.”
Suddenly everything changed. As soon as the batteries were in place, K grabbed the scale and ran into the bathroom. A few second later she came out- her whole demeanor changed. She no longer was looking forward, she was looking at the ground. She no longer had a bounce in her step, and most significantly, she now pulled her shirt out of her pants-it was no longer tucked in. “I didn’t lose any weight”, she sadly said, as though she had committed a crime.
What happened? What possibly could have happened in those few sort moments to make such a dramatic difference in K’s sense of self? In those few short seconds, a number on a scale had torn down K’s self confidence. A number on a scale had been given the power to destroy this woman’s self confidence! She still weighed the same with her shirt tucked in and her head held high. But a new number, a larger number, suddenly made her clothes feel tight-by adding shame to her mind.
Let’s hope for a time when scales don’t have that kind of power-when we have enough confidence in our bodies and our food choices to decide for ourselves how we feel-not some number on a machine.